The Official Tom Baker Orangutan Baby Doll...

In the past, I have made no secret of how disturbing I find those realistic baby dolls you see advertised in cheap TV mags and Sunday colour supplements. 

Imagine my surprise when this week's TV Choice carried an ad for yet another realistic 'baby' doll - but this time in the form of an orangutan. Yes, that's right - an orangutan. Disturbingly realistic looking (at least in the photos) and wearing human baby clothes... 

I had to do something about it... And fast!

Presenting the new 'Baby Doll Patrick' doll

As regular viewers know, I am still fascinated by those full page adverts for "limited edition collectors items" that clutter the pages of Sunday newspaper colour supplements. 

About a fortnight ago, I was quite shocked to discover there is now a Doctor Who cuckoo clock on sale. This is a couple a months after I debuted my Official Sydney Newman Doctor Who Cuckoo Clock. Life imitates art. 

Another one of those products that I find genuinely quite disturbing is the life-like baby doll models. These are disturbingly realistic 'dolls' designed to look as cute as possible but in reality have the souless eyes of a shop window mannequin. 

I created one in the image of the first Dr Who William Hartnell about a year ago. It certainly created a bit of a brouhaha with twitter comments ranging from 'I want one!" to "You are now blocked, you sick bastard!" 

I produced a postcard of it for last year's Whooverville convention and I sold well into double figures of it... about fourteen. 

With my medication wearing down over this Spring bank holiday, I decided to create a companion doll for the first one. For this, I apologise. 

Here it is... 

From our factory camp in North Korea to...

...your child's loving arms. Another satisfied customer!