Thursday, 11 September 2014

The Official DOCTOR WHO Writer Commemorative Collectors Plates

This is something I've been working on for.... oh... loads of hours today. I've nearly finished the 79 plate designs and hope that I will be paid the £50 I was offered for the gig tomorrow as I need to buy some food to eat over the weekend. 

Really looking forward to the finished product and to buying a new welsh dresser or two to display them all on. 

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STOP PRESS(20/09/2014): I've been asked to point out that the image of Paula Moore as depicted on plate 54 is an artist's impression only and may not be representative of the writer's actual appearance.  

STOP PRESS (21/09/2014): Owing to high demand from purchasers (including a bulk order from Little Chef Motorway Services Ltd), there are now very limited supplies. Phone now to order. Amongst those left in stock are seven Lesley Scots, some unboxed Geoffrey Ormes and a chipped Bidmead. Please state preference.

STOP PRESS (22/09/2014): Now sold out thanks to Poundland making an offer for the remainded lots. Check out your local branch from around Friday morning. Thanks for your support. 

STOP PRESS (23/09/2014): Just been informed that a street hawker has been trying to flog inferior knock-offs in Burton-on-Trent. These are not officially licenced and you are advised not to eat food from them. Local Trading Standards and that nice Dominic Littlewood have been informed.

STOP PRESS (24/09/2014): Still haven't been paid the fifty quid they offered me to design these plates - something to do with cash flow issues. They did send me as an apology a bizarre loving cup from their Complete Hammer Horror Georgian Tea Service range with Francis Matthews on one side and John Carson on the other. They said it was valuable. It's not the sort of thing I want on my welsh dresser. If anyone wants it, it's in a bin bag in the jitty next to my flat. Collect before Friday as that's when the bin men call.

STOP PRESS (25/09/2014): 
URGENT PRODUCT WARNING - Just had Derbyshire Trading Standards banging at my door. They told that the Official Doctor Who Writers Commemorative Plates are NOT microwaveable. They asked me if there was any way I could contact customers to instigate a product recall. I told them they had the wrong address and they went off somewhere else. Heavens. Just checked with my Tom McRae and they are right. Shit...!!!! Flat now reeks of rotting fish as well.

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